When we apologize we acknowledge and regret what we’ve done wrong, we feel empathy for the other person. We acknowledge the damage and then want to make things right, take actions to accept what we did wrong while taking full responsibility, and act accordingly.
The toxic or covert-aggressive personalities either never apologize or, they do, but it's completely fake.
They can apologize, they actually do apologize in many cases. But it's usually followed by blame shifting and/or a justification for what they did.
Pay close attention to their actions after the fake apology (it really feels fake) Nothing will change and you may end up feeling guilty for something that they did! Crazy, I know!
They may say "I'm sorry" but there won't be true repentance, they will simply justify their bad behavior with more excuses.
Very common scripts are:
"Yes I did this but you made me do it in a way"
"If you hadn’t done this or that I wouldn’t have done it"
"I had to do it because this and that..."
Narcissists can apologize, but it’s fake. It’s an empty apology. There’s no heartfelt regret, no feelings of guilt, no feelings attached to the apology.
When you realize that the ACTIONS don’t match up with the WORDS, you are long gone into the relationship. Why? Because if you are within a range of normalcy, It would never cross your mind that a person can be so fake and prioritize their agenda over another human beings feelings.
So yes. They do apologize. But it’s fake. You’ll see it, you’ll feel it.
Empty words, maybe followed by a covert-aggressive comment, or an excuse for what they did, or why not, maybe even a blaming game that ends on you.
Random fact alert: In today's video I try to remember the name of the character played by Keanu Reeves' on the movie The Matrix. Have you watched it?
No comments:
Post a Comment